Vincent told me, “You don’t sell cars. People just buy them from you.” He may be right. I’m a car salesman. One of the things I love about my job is that it’s beautifully simple. You want a thing, I show you the thing, you pay for the thing and the thing is yours! Another part I love; the sales process is universal. Why? Because the process of buying is universal.

The crap-pickers

I love reading sales books. I don’t always apply everything but every now and then something I’ve read comes in handy. One thing I’m currently exploring is enthusiasm. It’s mentioned in almost every sales book. “Enthusiasm sells!” “Sales is nothing more that a transfer of enthusiasm.” Are they right? I tried a little experiment yesterday and the results were outstanding.

My Mom takes care of my brother’s kids at least three days a week. They typically sit on the couch and drink 7up from a sippy cup. Even the youngest, Lila, knows how to navigate the “Just for Kidz” section in On-Demand. The weather yesterday was nice, so we were out in the backyard with Lila(age 3) and Julia(age 5). I noticed the backyard was covered in dog crap from my Mom’s two dogs. You know where this is going don’t you? No, I didn’t talk them into eating it but that also crossed my mind.
“Hey, Julia, wouldn’t it be awesome if we picked up all this dog crap right now?”
“Ew, I don’t wanna pick up dog crap. That’s gross!”
“Oh man, this is gonna be awesome. Lila, you wanna pick up dog crap with me, right? We’ll get plastic bags and then you can be the crap picker and I’ll hold the crap bag.”

Lila nodded with a big smile and followed me inside to find some plastic bags. “Crap,” became my buzzword. Everything became “crap this” and “crap that.” As soon as Julia saw how much fun we were having she couldn’t resist.
“Hey look at this piece of crap!”
“Whoa! That’s a nice piece of crap alright! Good find, Lila!” I laid the praise on lavishly. The momentum was building.
“You two have a knack for crap! There’s not a piece of crap that’s safe back here!” They were eating it up…Not the crap.

“There’s a pile of crap near your foot, Uncle Cam! Don’t step on it! I’ll get it!”

The work rate was blazing, yet it felt like an Easter egg hunt. The crap became scarce, the end was in sight and I had two world-class crap pickers on my hands. Could this be it?
“Go back in those bushes. The dogs love to go back there and crap.”
“Wow, there’s all kinds of craps back here!”
“Oh great, get em’ all! Also, crap is plural so you don’t have to put an ’s’ at the end of crap.” A grammar lesson to boot.

When we were all done, Lila and Julia had filled two plastic grocery bags with crap. They both peered inside, “Look at all this crap!” They were so proud that they didn’t want to throw the bags of crap away. They waited until their parents came to get them so they could show them what incredible crap-pickers they’d raised. I commemorated the experience with some photos. Tell me enthusiasm doesn’t work and I’ll show you two bags full of crap.

It’s been a year since the last time I picked up a microphone. Stand-up comedy is not for me. After hitting the stage for a year and a half, I came to the conclusion that it was not the path I’d like to take in comedy. It’s a unique art form all it’s own and is self selecting in the individuals it lets master it. That’s my way of saying “It was hard and I didn’t like it.” So many things about stand-up make it difficult. Once you get past the crippling anxiety of public speaking to illicit a specific response, you realize how many different jobs you have to do. You’re the writer, director, actor, producer, agent and promoter. I should have fired myself at least a baker’s dozen times. There are no shortcuts in stand-up. You and you alone are responsible for all your success and failure. If you’re lucky and you work hard, there will be a point where your successes outnumber your failures. I never made it to said point.

I met some very talented individuals along the way and I’m sure we will all see a few of them go on to bigger things. Overall, my comparably short stint in stand-up is one of my proudest accomplishments. When I started, I was reading low-brow jokes off my iphone notes. 3 minutes felt like an eternity. By the end, I could do 25 minutes and get a relatively positive and consistent response. Before I tried stand-up, my goal was to give it a fair chance and really try it. I am happy with my effort and my experience.

Fellow comedian and friend, Vlad Khlynin worked on this short project with me. I like the idea of short sketches that are mostly writing based. I wasn’t sure how this project was going to turn out, but I am very happy with the end result. There may be more Sincerely, Cam episodes to come.

My brother James is one of my favorite collaborators. We have an understanding when tackling a creative project, and after my first pimp video from a couple years ago, we decided to do it again. This time, some other people were coerced into acting in it. Shit Still Ain’t Easy features my girlfriend Lauren, Alex Wood, James Edmondson and me. I hope to put out more sketches this summer. Enjoy!

May marks my one year anniversary in comedy. I wanna say I’ve improved a lot and now I know where I’m going, but the truth is, I don’t know shit. Yeah, I’ve gotten better, but I still have such a long way to go. There’s so much to learn and trying to be conscious of all of it on stage will make you dizzy. The elements of comedy are so complex. You can work on your writing, act outs, stage presence, relationship with the room, crowd work, structuring your sets…It never ends. I think if I have learned one things, it’s the overall goal to become the most distilled version of myself. It’s a strange concept, but there’s a gap I’m trying to close. I think I heard Ira Glass from NPR talking about the gap between where you are, and the artist you ultimately want to be. I want to include all the elements of my social sense of humor in a cranked up and embellished performance. My thought is that the more I perform and work at it, the more I will hone in on my specific voice. I have no idea how long this will take. I’ve heard some comics say it takes a couple years, I’ve heard others say it can take 10 years. Whatever. As of now, I’m in.

I’ve gained a huge amount of respect for stand-up as an art. It’s so underrated, and many people don’t give it the respect it deserves. What separates us from other artists is that to grow and get better, you have to openly and publicly fail and embarrass yourself over and over. You’d think stand-ups would have a thick skin, but they’re some of the most sensitive people I’ve met. Myself included.

Anyway, I’ve gotten a lot of shit from my friends about not updating my blog, which I’ve been incredibly lazy about. I got sick of watching myself suck on video so I stopped filming for a long time. I always hear comics say “It’s not a race. It’s a marathon.” It definitely feels like one. I’ll try to be better about doing more on my blog. Enjoy the vid!

I had a 7 minute spot at the Poleng Lounge and this show is a good example of a showcase spot. A showcase, or booked show, is when the show’s promoter will hand pick the comics they’d like to perform. These are usually the best shows to invite your friends to because there’s a lot of good talent and they won’t have to wait 3 hours to see you. This event was hosted by the one and only, Tony Sparks. He always keeps the energy level up and the crowd happy. Thanks to Brad Wrage for filming and editing and everyone who came out to watch(El Boy and Lauren).

Cameron Edmondson Standup from Jonathan Edwards on Vimeo.

Salutations loyal fans and bodaggots. I will be performing tomorrow in San Rafael as a part of Griffin Daley’s Comedy Bonanza. Also performing will be the curly haired, angel boy, Trevor Hill. Come get some ya’ll.

I will be hosting The Stud located at 9th and Harrison every Wednesday in December. I love hosting and making the room fun for comedians and audience members, both. Come enjoy some anonymous gay sex and some great drink specials. Tis the season!

Love ya lots!

Cam

December marks my 6th month doing stand up comedy. Stand up is so hard. It’s hard just to get good enough to suck. I hear different things from different comics like “yeah, it’s normal to do stand up for 10 years before you get to be any good.” That might discourage me if I thought I had another career option. I hope I’m able to work in comedy in some form or another.

Sometimes I mess up a joke and the mistake gets more laughs, especially when I can play along with it. This set had a good example of that when I mess up my line “I brought a religious girl home.” As always, it’s a work in progress.